How real life put my online world into perspective

Life offline is where I find my freedom and creativity

AI image generated with Dall•E (by me)

My car is the perfect place for thinking, musing, and daydreaming. Recently, on one of my thinking drives, I realized I am completely detached from my online persona—the Marie version you are reading here.

I thought: whatever happens with the online 'me,' it can't reach or touch this real-life 'me.' While writing this as the real-life me, I know I won't feel attached to this piece anymore once it’s done, scheduled, and launched into the world.

It used to be different. I used to be extremely nervous when publishing something and waiting for the comments, overthinking when no comments came in, or overanalyzing the comments that did come in. Worrying what people would think. Being online constantly and replying immediately when someone reacted.

But then real life happened, and I realized it didn't matter that much. My world will not end if my online world ends. It cannot reach me here. Whatever happens online cannot affect the life I’m living - unless I let it affect me. I would still have my place to live, food on the table, my sweet Lola, my friends and my dear family.

The Bored Millennial was the biggest thing in my life for the first four months of it’s existence. It swallowed me up whole. I spent hours and hours on Substack. I could barely detach from it and was obsessed. Then, something bigger happened, and it made me realize that Substack is not my whole world. It's important to me, yes, but not that important. Life is to be lived away from the screen.

My best writing ideas come when I'm outside in nature, and that's the case for most people. And I love writing. It gets me into flow, it grounds me, it helps me understand. And substack is an awesome tool that helps me to distribute my writing. But I’m not consumed by the tool, anymore.

While writing this, I'm constantly thinking: what's the point I want to bring home?

The point is that what has helped me the most with this online endeavor is not putting too much importance on what I'm doing online.

I try not to overthink the notes I'm sharing, the video I've posted, or the long-form posts I send out. That has helped me a ton. It makes me feel free and allows me to follow my instincts.

For example, 6 months ago, I would have shitted my pants to make a video and post it online. Seriously, filming yourself feels a bit awkward. And it’s scary knowing that - in theory - every human being with access to the internet could see this video. And, worse, judge it.

But! The chance of many people seeing this is already low, and even if they do, what's the worst that can happen?

Mean comments?

Online comments from people you don't know and people who don't know you. Yes, it would certainly hurt, but it often says more about the person leaving the comment than about you.

Losing all my subscribers?

That would be painful, but mainly for my ego, nothing else would be damaged.

And who would still be there?

That’s right. My family, friends, Lola, my house, and food on the table.

And what would hurt the absolute most?

Losing one of those mentioned above.

Realizing all of this made it easier for me to post that video and keep writing whatever is on my mind. Some might think it’s because I’ve already established an audience and people supporting my work that it’s easier. And yes, that might be true. I do have more confidence thanks to all the positive support. But my biggest growth was happening during my Substack obsession—not now. Yet I feel way better today because I understand now that life is bigger than this.

So, don’t be afraid to start an online life; the risk of something bad happening is seriously low, making it even more worthwhile. There is a bigger chance something positive comes out of it than something negative. And you will always gain something out of a new experience!

Learnings

You might have guessed, I’ve just released my very first video content into the world!

The editing process was fun. Learning which tools to use and how to make it all come together, I liked it. Since I don’t have the habit of filming or documenting my life through video, it took some getting used to. More than once, I forgot to film or even bring my phone with me!

I decided not to send the video post via email, as I didn’t want to fill your inboxes with video.

Here you can see the stats:

There is a big difference between my email and video post. But I have barely promoted it, and it feels more comfortable to me this way. It’s something I want to ease into. I’d love to hear your feedback. For example, somebody told me the video was too long. That’s very valuable information for me, so don’t hold yourself back. Also, let me know if you have any questions about the 75 Hard Challenge so I can address them in the following video.

On another note, I’ve also started sending out my welcome messages again (through Substack chat), and I’m thrilled to be getting back into that habit. I had to catch up sending these messages since July 15th!

Earnings Week 31

We continue at a steady growth, and two new paid subscribers joined 🤩 Welcome!!

This weekend

I am on a family weekend. A tradition since I was a baby. Every year, the last weekend of September you will find us in this same house secluded between the fields and the woods in Wallonia. And every year again we are all super excited for this weekend. And every year we do exactly the same things and even eat the same things. It’s the company of each other we all love so much.

I am very grateful for my family.

🧡

Some images from last week

Much love and have an awesome weekend,

Marie

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