From really crazy growth to a painful downfall.

My 6-month newsletter review: Why simple is always better.

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I struggled with what to write about here for the whole week. First, I thought I would give you an in-depth review of my first six months on Substack, analyzing the numbers, sharing the do’s and don’ts, bullet points,…the whole shebang. But it felt inauthentic. Then I thought, “But it's the premise of this newsletter, to share my growth and journey of building a business online. I should write about these 24 weeks in depth.”

Then I thought: “This is my newsletter, and I do the f*ck I want.”

And that felt strong and empowering.

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So last week, I launched a summer discount action. I naively anticipated a lot of enthusiasm, but it was a cold shower. I didn't check my emails for 18 hours after sending my email, so excitement had built. What will I find in my mailbox? I'll report the truth to you, as always. 1 person signed up in those 18 hours.

My knee-jerk reaction was,

“Okay, that sucks, but it's also fine, not what I hoped, but I will promote it more and better. I will write lots of notes and send another promotional email. People just need some more little nudges.”

I assured myself, “Yeah, that's a good plan.”

But then, slowly, I started thinking more deeply about it. How the discount never felt right from the beginning. How I was doubting to do it. And I wondered: “If only 1 person on 3500 reacts to this, is it even what people want?” I don't hesitate to buy a dress I want when it's 20% off (or it must be very expensive).

It didn't feel right. Something was off.

Although admitting this to you is painful, I know what was off. Now, I will be completely honest with you, and it's not pretty. It doesn't make me look good, but not telling feels worse.

So, here it comes.

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The Truth

Three months ago, I set some goals for this newsletter—I even shared them here. However, it became crystal clear I would not reach those goals.

I wanted:

▢ 5000 subs

▢ 100 paid subscribers

✔ Launch my 1st product

Not reaching the goals made me desperate.

Leading to desperate moves, I didn't even believe in myself. Offering a discount? Selling what I worked hard for, even cheaper? Just to up the number of paid subs? So I could check a box, I put there myself?

Hoping every note would go viral. Thinking about sharing and selling my substack 'strategy'? While I don't feel comfortable monetizing that kind of information? Sussing myself by saying, “Yeah, but you are different; you won't give a magic formula, just honesty.” Having a weird ass unclear and messy offer? Changing it almost every week?

No, no, no. This is wrong.

My biggest mistake was using tactics I don't believe in just to check those boxes. This made my 'trademark' of authenticity feel fake and fraudulent. I was chasing that orange checkmark of a 'Substack Bestseller,' believing people would take me seriously if I had that badge. It would be official. “I made it on Substack.”

But by chasing my goals, I lost touch with myself. I was forcing things on myself and you, my dear reader.

I launched these 'Monthly Connect Sessions' without ever asking my paid subscribers if they would be interested in them. Only two people signed up. Isn't that clear as hell?

I wrote two extra articles, one behind my paywall and one offering extra resources if you sign up. That led to six new paid subscribers. I mean, the writing is on the wall. It's f*cking clear. But I ignored it, getting so caught up in arbitrarily set goals.

That's why I felt uneasy about it.

That is also why I decided to cancel the monthly connect sessions. I'll only write notes when I feel like it. I'll keep up with my weekly Friday newsletter and one or two extra articles behind the paywall each month. It's what I love doing most.

I won't set new goals for the next 12 weeks or start building a new course. The time is not right, and I don't have the energy for it. I won't force myself to do things that don't feel right.

Honestly, right now, I believe what people want is just this:

My writing—my stories.

As simple as that.

Just my writing.

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My six-month journey on Subtack

So, no in-depth analysis in this newsletter, but I do want to share this:

It's all about mindset. And it's all about what you put in, you'll get back. I could thrive here because of my energy and mindset. It was super positive, and I went all in for weeks and months. But today, when I'm not doing so well, I still feel a strong connection and get amazing support. Because of all the time and effort, I put in previously.

The community is amazingly loyal and forgiving.

You can make a mistake. Just own it. Be honest, be you.

Go for some simple actions you believe in. It can be different things:

• Posting a weekly newsletter

• Reacting to comments

• Be active on notes

• Send DM's

• ...

I did all of those with intensity, and I grew a lot. Now, I do none of those—except for writing my weekly newsletter—and I still grow—a lot slower, but there is growth.

You choose what works for you and how much time and effort you can put into it. A lot of effort, time, and a strong belief will result in big results. But you don't have to go for big results if you don't have the time or energy.

You do you.

And that's for everything in life.

Your health, wealth, relationships, professional career, and hobbies.

Setting goals is good, but not if you get consumed by them.

This was a very wise lesson for me.

I hope that sharing my story can help you, too. Maybe for every person saying they hit their goals, ten people had the same goal but never achieved them and didn't dare share that side. Who knows?

Just know this: we don't always achieve what we want, but then, did we really want it?

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Earnings

My beautiful milestones after 24 weeks of The Bored Millennial:

• From 41 subscribers to 3,657 subscribers

• From 41 followers to 5,083 followers on Substack

• From 2.595 LinkedIn followers to 8,177 followers in total (getting close to 10,000)

• From 4,61 euro to a net volume of + 1,000 euro

• From 0 to 50 beautiful paid subscribers 🧡

• 1 founding member

Look where I came from.

I still believe anything is possible.

For anyone.

My little spreadsheet:

This week

I finally started grieving. For what was, for what I left behind. I accept that I am not doing well. I'm overeating. I'm scrolling endlessly. I'm buying stuff I don't need. If it weren't for my dog, Lola, I would be staying in bed. I'm not taking good care of myself. A lot feels forced and requires a lot of energy. I'm not reaching out. I'm closing myself off.

But I know this will pass, and I'll emerge stronger and truer to myself. I need time. And I'm allowing myself the time I need.

Also, I have the best support.

From my family, my friends, my readers.

Thank you.

❤️

Marie