For years, I've been trying to beat boredom out of my life. I mainly hate it when nothing sparks my interest. When I feel lethargic and open one tab after the other without actually doing anything.
That type of boredom I despise.
But then there's another type I wouldn't even call 'boring' until somebody told me, 'But that's so boring'. The person was criticizing the life I live. A life - now I realise - many would call boring.
Have you ever heard of the Perfect Day exercise?
It's pretty simple: imagine what your perfect day would look like. You can go as crazy as you want, but you must write it all down. Then, you can reverse engineer and ask yourself:
What needs to be done to live those perfect days?
My perfect day would look like this:
I wake up energized, without an alarm. I open the curtains and see a beautiful sunrise over the fields and trees. My sweet dog is super excited to see me, and we go for a long morning walk.
After the walk, I have a coffee, fresh eggs as breakfast and I start a 3-hour deep work block of writing in my own perfectly designed office. Then, I take another break and meditate or exercise. I'll do a bit more work before preparing a healthy, delicious lunch.
After lunch, I'd take 2 hours of reading outside in the garden while the dog plays around. Then, I'd work out, or go for another long walk, or visit a museum. Or I’d be preparing for an upcoming trip to a sunny country.
To finish my perfect day, I would order an Ottolenghi-type dinner for my best friends or family, who would come over. We’d have delicious red wine, great conversations, and lots of belly laughs. Then, I would take a final evening walk with the dog and go to bed around 10:30 PM.
Many people would call that 'boring', but to me, it sounds perfect.
How far have I come?
Before COVID, I commuted to the office every day. I would spend at least three hours a day on the road. I wasn't reading or taking good care of myself. I was addicted to scrolling. Exercising was not a part of my life. I tried eating healthy but often failed miserably. The mindset was negative; I was drinking a lot of alcohol. I used the weekends to 'relax and unwind', usually ending up with a huge hangover, wasting my Saturdays and Sundays.
But I did have great evenings with my friends and family. That’s luckily a constant in my life.
Compared to my old life, today, I'm much closer to this 'perfect day' than I ever was.
The 'slow life' you see and read about is still much more idyllic than my 'boring' life. But I'm not striving for that aesthetically pleasing look for videos. I'm striving for a life that makes me happy and feel fulfilled. And honestly, when I'm reading my book in the late afternoon, cozy on the couch, with my doggie beside me, I am pretty happy and feeling damn fulfilled with my life as it is.
Hope you enjoyed this short piece!
Have a great weekend,
Marie
x
Boring used to be good, as a boring life meant a safe life. It's just the latter few generations that has been led to believe that we should all aspire to become rock stars, celebrities and now influencers. After WW2, most people wanted boring, and now as the world is becoming more chaotic again, I believe that many of us are realizing that boring isn't so bad. Here in Norway we have a term we use a lot, the "A4-life". It just means a typical or standard life. A house, a partner, a dog, a decent job, a station wagon and a couple of kids is the example we usually use to describe the A4 life. It used to be something to aspire to, but is now almost exclusively as an insult to describe a boring life.
I like boring. Time slows down a bit when you're not constantly chasing highs.
Thank you for reminding me that i'm not quite far off from my perfect day. I found this in my evernote archive from March 2021:
"My perfect day begins when I open my eyes and think “Wow, that was a great sleep. I’m so thankful.” I would have woken up well rested in the arms of someone I love and be filled with gratitude for everything I have in my life. Thankful for my sleep, partner, family, job, health, and all the love I’ve received and will continue to receive in my life.
Maybe I’ll snooze, but only for a couple of minutes. I’m a woman who knows when to rest and when to work hard after all. After getting out of bed, I would down a glass of cold water and be thankful for how it refreshed my body. While my coffee is brewing, I would put away any dishes that has finished drying.
After my coffee is ready, I’ll sit down at my usual writing spot and write.
[Note: no instagram or social media is in here. No moping. Only gratitude.]
The rest of my day is spent checking off the items on my to-do list with confidence and conviction. I would feel an immense pride for my work and be thankful that *I’m* the one that gets to do this job. I would feel thankful for the woman I have became. I would feel thankful for all my achievements and most importantly, my grit and values.
I would have finished the day feeling accomplished and resolved in my abilities and competence.
I would make dinner with my love and talk about our day - all the things that made us happy or sad, big or small. We would talk about anything we’re looking forward to or any challenges that we might be facing. In this moment, I would think to myself... I'm so thankful for my partner. I'm so thankful for his support, warmth, and thoughtfulness. I'm so thankful to be loved and cherished by him.
I would go to sleep feeling thankful for such a beautiful and productive day. I would fall asleep comfortably in his arms after maybe reading a bit here and there. And if we don’t want to read… we would just talk about our dreams and where we want to travel next together. And if we don’t want to do that… we’ll just do nothing and be thankful to be in each other’s company.
The perfect day for me is when I’m thankful, feeling accomplished, and spending time with the person I love.
(There's a doggo retriever in here somewhere)"